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teacher: don't bullshit this essay
me: i'm gonna bullshit this essay

sodamnrelatable:

I got some McDonalds and it costed $6.66 and my cashier said “oh lawd can you order some extra sauce or somtin gawd has been good to me that number is for da devil or somtin”

spangefucker:

"in case of fire use stairs" that’s ridiculous.  how the FUCK am i supposed to put this fire out with these stairs

kissesforyourloving:

prejaculate:

imagine if you had to wait until you were 21 to drink alcohol

not sure if someone from another country posted this or a very enthusiastic underage drinker

Cashier: That'll be $17.67
Me: *hands over $20*
Mom: I HAVE THE 67 CENTS

crystallized-teardrops:

shoutout to people who know where they want to be in the future because that shit is scary

statechampionship:

bogleech:

HE NEEDS TO STAND ON CHURCH GROUNDS SOMEWHERE IN HEAVY RAIN AND JUST SCREAM AND SCREAM AS IT ALL MELTS OFF

Okay satan we get it you are an evil genius

foxnewsofficial:

sometimes i’ll have loads of money and then other times i’ll be awake

Dear white people…

lustern:

is it just me or once you start watching a new serie all the gifsets of it are suddenly on your dash